TramueL, Brian

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Life Changes - Chris

Wisdom and Maturity?

So… I have written something for this exactly 12 times since my longtime friend, the illustrious Mr. Tramuel, graciously extended an invitation to participate. The previous 12 all have found the virtual circular file (or was it rectangular), and here I sit reliving my college experience of writing a paper the night before it is due. I was ecstatic about the invite, and I thought of the many ways that I could expound on the subject. Seeing that I am 52 but looking like a spry 51-year-old I thought that I could extol on my great escape from the grips of father time and how my way of life should be the blueprint for making it to the ripe old age of Methuselah. However, a quick visit to the mirror reminded me that I hadn’t escaped from father time unscathed. The gray in my beard and the spare tire quickly brought me back from my bourbon-induced hallucination and planted my feet firmly back into reality. It was very good bourbon though.

Where do I start this? Well, let’s talk about age and what it is supposed to grant to you as the years' pass. Age is supposed to bring you wisdom. I have been hoping to wake up one day with this newly found wisdom to share with the world, or at least my world. I am not sure if I have been granted the wisdom to know if I have been granted the wisdom. I will say that I have a lot of life experiences that have shaped my view of the world. From my experience, we all step into, and out of, circles of friends, family, and acquaintances throughout our life, and the transitions are not always without turmoil. Some of the exits may not be voluntary and tend to be messy, while others happen so seamlessly that we don’t realize that we are no longer active participants in the group. By the time we reach “middle age”, we realize that no relationship is guaranteed, and the transition from circle to circle usually comes from our outgrowing our role in that group. Life experiences allow us to see through many of the shallow facades that people hide behind, and they help us to discern whether we should give our precious time to unfulfilling people or endeavors. I am not sure that this is wisdom, but for the sake of my ego, I am going to say that it makes the cut.

Well, what about maturity? Isn’t that the partner of wisdom. Can you be wise without being mature? What does maturity look like? Is it corduroy sports jackets with elbow patches and a pipe? Do you have to dress a certain way, or stop doing certain things to show that you are mature? I would say no. My definition of maturity has nothing to do with how you dress or the types of activities in which you participate. I define maturity as the acquired ability to identify that things are constantly changing, and to understand your role, and responsibilities, regardless of the changes that come your way. In my opinion, maturity cannot be determined by appearance, but by actions.

As I wrap up this musing, I must change one thing. I don’t look a year over 41. I am blessed beyond measure with my roles and responsibilities as a husband and a father. I am sure that these roles, along with the many experiences during my trips around the sun, have helped me to reach this level of maturity and wisdom. While I may have my moments when the casual onlooker may question my age and maturity level, they tend to be few and far between. That is my story, and I am sticking to it. Now if you excuse me, I will retreat into my quiet corner until the next time.

Where is my bourbon?