Today I remind myself and y’all of the self-locality of my views, assumptions, and conclusions, and to explicitly affirm the right of y’all to hold your own but I ain’t gon’ hold y’all, this is my post so find something safe to do. 

We bastardized the terms we use in relationships, the number one stunner “emotionally available.” There are women using this as a talking point and posted as the headline on their dating/ social media profile. I find it curious when I consider the women who are using this, my observation is that they themselves have negative emotional attachments showing up as a hidden appeal of deprivation.

Using “to me” language

Insecurity, envy, and compulsive desires are recognized as problems for many of us. These are symptoms, however, not the deeper problem. At the root of the problem is our emotional attachment to a feeling of deprivation. What we don't see and don't want to see is that, deeper down in our mind, we are compelled to entertain or indulge in a feeling of being deprived or a feeling of missing out on something significant.

Using “to them” language

This is “giving very much” a negative emotional attachment.

When I have difficulty feeling harmony and peacefulness, it’s usually due to a conflict in my mind. A battle between two negative polarities: aggression and passivity.

Passivity

Patient— believing intimacy, romance, and emotional connection (reciprocal) is worthy of my time and effort.

Aggression

Aware— and not willing to continuously give my time, (money) and effort when it is not reciprocated.

Passivity normally wins,  but I can hear the streets calling and I’m in the mood to fuck something up.

B not Bey’