Random Post About Not Having Anything To Post

RE:Post

Mr.TramueL’s Top Ten List of Things He Would Write About ‘Cause They’ve Been Sitting in His Drafts Folder For a Year.

I know that’s an extremely long title for a list … anywho

10. My Fascination With My Teeth After Every Dental Visit. I’d write about this except for you all already receive the spammed texts, Emails, tweets & links to “How to whiten your teeth for free”

9.  Happy Valentines Day! I would write about this one except for funds were low this year (as they were last year)  & I didn’t feel like haggling with the authorized resellers of baskets along the side of the road. The snow didn’t even stop these guys this year!

8. The Realest (Insert Explicative) I Ever Wrote. I’d write about this except I want to do a VBlog {The Reason I keep playing with Youtube Video’s & Editing them} … except then it wouldn’t be “The Realest (insert Explicative) I Ever Wrote” … it would be “The Realest (Insert Explicative) I Ever Recorded and that doesn’t sound as sexy.

7. Eff a Quote, Tell Me What You Know. I hate when people (RE)Tweet, Update their status or e-mail me intuitively obvious quotes from famous people. “If you put on your shoes in the morning without putting on your socks first then today you will be without socks.” –Anonymous … I’d write about his but it must be true ‘cause Rev Run Wisdom wrote it.

6. Social Media Beef. My Ex-Wife, Baby-Mama mother of my child proceeds to tell all of her Facebook friends that I was an absentee father because of something that happened between her & my son {What did I have to do with it? … Nothing.} She is Bi-Polar mistaken, we were all together days before that on a road trip home to VA, days before that she called ‘cause she broke a nail & couldn’t drive him to get a haircut for ROTC. Yeah I would write about that except for they won’t find her until the leaves blow away ‘cause I’m not raking til’ Spring.

5. The Disconnect. I’d write about this but I would need years of research and it’s already been proven that Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Have you ever worked with, dated, met, held a conversation with someone where you’ve just looked at them and said … well, nothing? I’ve learned that there are two kinds of people who don't say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot.

4. What I Wanna be When I Grow Up. I’d write about this except I don’t wanna grow up. Be more childlike and less childish.

3. Little Known Mr.TramueL Facts. You all know why I can’t write about this … it’s all relative and according to the general theory of relativity t!his  would cause a Black Hole. {Science}

2. I’m the Best You’ll Ever Have. I’d write about this ‘cause every woman I’ve ever dated be on that same ole’ bullshyt  “They are the best I’ve ever had” & that I’ll wish that I’d stayed with them & eventually at some point I’ll want them back but it will be too late. Out of all of the random women I’ve smashed beautiful ladies I’ve dated it hasn’t happened yet. Note to Self: Mr.TramueL One. Beautiful ladies Zero.

And the Number 1ne Thing Mr.TramueL Would Write About ‘Cause They’ve Been Sitting in His Drafts Folder For a Year ………….

1. Women are Manipulators, Men are Controlling. I would write about this one except “she” said “If you don’t get off of that machine and come get on t!his …” but I chastised her for not using the or-else clause.

TOP TEN WAYS TO KILL THE “N-WORD” ONCE AND FOR ALL……..

          

  Written & Illustrated By Lena Hopkins-Jackson

* DISCLAIMER: This one will not be in "Rolling Out" magazine.com this week. It's a tad too racy I guess ( pun intended). Either way

I'm sharing it and though I created this in the spirit of humor, there's truth in jest sooooooooooo here are the.....

TOP TEN WAYS TO KILL THE “N-WORD” ONCE AND FOR ALL……..

          10. Terminate it…..( James Cameron style )

       Create a cyborg-terminator from "SKYNET" (..um,The Black-operated division)

to travel back several hundred years into the past and ‘eliminate’ the dumb-@ss, non-pronouncing slave trader strolling along the river NIGER who started this mess in the 1st d@mn place!

9. Send it out to Crystal Lake and let Jason have at it……….

 We can all agree that the “N-Word” is the ‘Asian-hair supply store’ of racial epithets: It’s EVERYWHERE and much like Jason, just won’t die! So who better than “Mister-crazy-hockey-mask-killer”  himself  to do away with it once and for all….Jason can stab it, axe it, burn it alive.. Whatever, just KILL IT so it will never come back! ...and while we’re it, let’s throw “Keeping It Real” under the bus too, that phrase NEEDS to die...seriously.

8. Create a “It’s-Okay-To-Say-N@gger”  Day……

 For an ENTIRE 24 hours Caucasions can get this word they’re just ITCHING to say out of their systems for good….AND Black people are NOT allowed to ‘retaliate’ at all! (Yup, those are the  rules!) From normally, mild-mannered corporate bankers to Fox-News staff, White folks will be drunk with euphoria and screaming it to the top of their lungs… um, that is until midnight and after that it’s every Biff and Buffy to fend for themselves ( God help 'em’) I’m guessing Black folks will be so tired of hearing it , this will finally do the trick…..except in  perhaps Compton, where the N-Word and jherri curls flow more fluently than water….still.

7. Hire Justin Beiber and Hannah-Montana to sing a duet about it…..

   Dude....Ya’ just gotta’ love that Beiber Kid and Miley  Cyrus is the new Britney, minus the side-order of crazy!

So here’s my modest proposal: we have these two little," white-bread wonders"create a chart-topping song about “The N-Word” to be played ‘ad nauseum’ on every radio station and in between every commercial on Nickelodeon! Eventually every kid in America will be so SICK of hearing it there will be an anti-N-word backlash so huge, that  no one will be caught dead saying it for fear of appearing ‘un-cool’.

6. Create an episode of “The Boondocks” about it.

Here’s something ground-breaking: Characters gratuitously call each other the “N-word” in hopes of showing Black people how truly self-loathsome and….WAIT, hold-up...( *pauses to read memo*)…my bad, that idea has actually INCREASED the acceptance of the word….uh, never mind….. NEXT!

5. Film a new, Spike Lee joint : “Mo-Bettah’ Uses For You-sez' Than The “N-Word’….....Fever”

   In Spike’s well-loved & unique style;actors would speak directly into the camera about how wack the “N-Word” is, followed by typical ‘Spike-isms’ such as pulling actors on that weird, slow-moving crane and dream-sequences with the ‘art-house’ camera angles of how THEY would handle Black folks too “Bamboozled” to stop using the word … one of which would be to give them a ‘hundred headaches’.. ya’ d@mn skippy! *Sound track by Public Enemy (minus “Flava-Flave” for obvious reasons)

4. Have Oprah do a show about it:

Special guests could include: Mel Gibson, Dr. Laura Schlesinger, Michael Richards and surviving members of the third Reich discussing why the term means so much to them. Dr. Oz can even come on and explain why the “N-word” is sooooo unhealthy for our bodies to use, then Dr. Phil can come scream at all of them about how their racist reputations are killing their careers and “How’s that working for ya’?” followed by Oprah herself banning the word forever…or else! (And we don’t want to find out what “or else” means, do we now...Arsenio?)

3.  Ask Beyonce` to do a public service announcement campaign against it on all the major networks and cable channels………

 It’ll be like a televised game of “Simon-Says” but with much higher stakes! Everybody knows Beyonce`and her magical, mechanical hand can do ANYTHING and if she’ll throw in a half-nekkid performance of her “Uh-Ohh--Uh-Ohh” dance while condemning the word….I think she’ll have the nation’s  FULL attention…..okay, at least half the nation anyway.

2. Have President Obama tax it :

 Put a $100 fine on anyone saying the word in public from here on out and we could probably pay off the national debt by “New Years Eve” ( by Christmas if someone can bug the central offices of Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin )

..and the number one way to ‘KILL’ the “N-word” once and for all is to ( drum roll please)…..

1. Just stop saying it and take the power out of it…seriously.

 It’s a bastard word that’s been embraced for far too long: ignorantly created by some racist Whites to keep our ancestors in check,...THEN twisted around and re-claimed by Blacks for survival so they could endure the pain inflicted by it ( Among other atrocities) to rob us of our humanity! Now it’s the big, BLACK elephant in the room that everyone’s too scared to shoot and take out of it's misery. Even though it’s never cool for Whites to use it…Black folks NEED to stop saying it as well. Sure, it won’t happen overnight but if Blacks survived the middle passage, killing one stupid word can be done………um, can’t it?

....your thoughts please.

LHJ.

Via "Your Weekly Top Ten" Facebook Fan Page

Mr.TramueL's Observation of Professional Work Environments That Are Not

Companies spend in excess of millions on their Brand through advertising and marketing. Image right? It’s so very necessary. Take for example professional sports organizations, world class right? (Rhetorical) They have development leagues for players that haven’t reached their full potential. Today I’m coining the phrase Semi-Professional Businesses for companies that haven’t reached their full potential.

Mr.TramueL’s Top Ten Reasons To (RE)Consider your business model.

10. When the Monday morning meeting looks like the line outside Club 935 or {Insert a hot club in yo’ city.} I’m just saying, if I can see your thong it’s wrong.

9. Teeth. You can’t speak to me about how great your benefits package is if the person you have facilitating has been in your employ for 14 years but their mouth looks like they chew coal colored rocks. Health benefits kick in after 30 days, dental must start in year 15.

8. Speak up! I know we are inside but u.s.e.  y.o.u.r.  w.o.r.d.s. I don’t care for squeaky mousey talking people. You’re a professional now put on your BIG boy & girl drawz and sound off.

7. I understand we all have different experiences, we’ve worked different jobs. If your previous employer was so great why are you here? If I have to hear how you did things there one more time! Null.

6. If your receptionist looks & smells like the smoking man from the X-Files it’s time to reconsider your ”lead from the lobby” strategy.

5. My pants sag because I have nasatall, but I’m constantly adjusting them so I don’t look like I’m on the yard. The corporate thug look is not a good look. {“No as* at all” for ya’ll always needing to have jokes explained}

4. Within every company, there will always be one know it all who think that they know what's going on; this person must be fired. Corollaries: 1. Nobody whom you ask for help will see it. 2. The first person who stops by, whose advice you really don't want to hear, will see it immediately.

3. Not really a reason to (RE)Consider your business model but more of a pet peeve. Reset the microwave! If you stop your food before the pre-set time, hit the clear button so that the next person can enjoy their delectable, tasty treat.

2. Your “Want Ad” should read & tell the truth. Strong communication skills: {Translation} You will write tons of documentation and letters.

1. Train your employees on proper bathroom etiquette. Small talk about the weather & dead air fillers should be reserved for your customers. When I’m at the urinal I just want to make pee-pee, I don’t want to hear that the water is cold or deep.

Live Well,

Mr. "My Pleasure" TramueL