Authentic, Balanced, and Rooted

There’s a difference between being seen and being understood. Social media, for all its supposed connectivity, often reduces us to highlight reels of curated moments—real, yes, but incomplete. For those who’ve known me for years and those who only know the digital me, I wonder if the connection ever goes deeper than the surface.

Consider my approach to possessions, for example. I talked about buying a new weekend bag, it’s not because I’m obsessed with bags, although I do love a fucking bag. It’s because I value quality over quantity. I have a leather weekend bag that I’ve used solely for traveling and it has lasted 20 years, an indication of intentional living. Yet the takeaway for some isn’t the principle of longevity, it’s “Brian likes bags.” & now a flood of recommendations for every trendy bag marketed on social media.

This kind of disconnect bleeds into other parts of my life. I love supporting small businesses that prioritize craftsmanship, and customer service yet people equate this with sending me influencer-endorsed products or things that aren’t my style. They see the curated snippets; my meals, my coffee, my BMW, my high-rise apartment and weave narratives that miss the essence.

I don’t post for the sake of being seen. My life is about function and form, not flash. I chose my car, a 2016 BMW (2016 before all of the high end technology) because I admire its aesthetic simplicity and performance, not the badge. My high-rise apartment is about the view and the quiet luxury of well-thought-out spaces, and it’s proximity to work, not status. Even cooking, which I love, is an art form for me; texture, flavor, and intention; not a trend fueled by viral recipes or gimmicky gadgets.

And yet, despite my clarity, people assume. They think sending me endless TikToks or tagging me in every local product is a way of showing care. But true care isn’t about noise it’s about listening, about understanding.

Conversations often follow the same pattern. I value depth, and genuine dialogue sparked by a shared idea or observation. I’m not saying every conversation has to be this way… but somehow, my preference for meaningful connection gets misinterpreted as an invitation to force interactions. Small talk about the weather or contrived dialogue doesn’t fill the gap; it widens it.

All of this to say… seeing someone and truly understanding them are two different things. Seeing me is noticing my curated world of aesthetics, quality, and intentionality. Understanding me is knowing why I value these things—not for the trend or the show, but because they resonate with my values of intentionality, quality, and meaningfulness... living in a way that feels authentic, balanced, and rooted in purpose.

Sometimes, “I see you” carries more weight than “I love you.” It’s about recognizing the quiet complexities, the intentional choices, and the values that shape a life. In a world full of noise, there’s nothing more meaningful than feeling truly understood.