Tuesday Musings and What’s On My Mind Right Now

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Tuesday Musings and What’s On My Mind Right Now

Death and Loss: The Weight of Remembrance

The two-year remembrance of my mother brings the weight of grief back into sharp focus, but this time it feels layered with the pain of others around me. Witnessing my co-worker and close friend endure their own losses has deepened my reflections on death. Their grief reminds me of the universality of sorrow, yet each person’s experience is so uniquely personal. As I support them, I find my own grief taking on new dimensions, teaching me not just about the fragility of life but also the importance of remembrance as a way to honor both the loss and the lessons left behind by those we loved.

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Love Impressions

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Love Impressions

I like things in their place, I'm not a neat freak per se but I do like things neat, organized, and in good order – Fastidious.

The word fastidious traces to the Latin noun fastidium, meaning "aversion" or "disgust." Fastidium itself is probably a combination of the Latin words fastus, meaning "arrogance," and taedium, meaning "irksomeness" or "disgust." Shout out to my HS Latin teacher Shirley Wingo. 

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Forty Years To Life - AS Esq.

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Forty Years To Life - AS Esq.

“One must possess oneself, and be alone in possession of oneself.”

We can’t take care of others of we don’t take care of ourselves; in a relationship, a family or a friendship — A supreme challenge of life is reconciling the longing to fulfill ourselves in union, in partnership, and in love. Writing helps me reconcile that longing. I open my space to others to express themselves, to carve out a little time to say their ‘peace’

AS Esq.,

4-0, UM OK?

Last time I submitted a piece; I was counting down to 39! Oh how my days have changed! …

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Checking In. Checking On.

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Checking In. Checking On.

I had a friend check in with me this week. We spoke about (me) having a good week and hitting all my ‘metrics’ — Meditation, prayer, exercise, reading, water, sleep and I checked in/checked on some folks while minding my business. They in turn discussed the challenges they faced and asked how I outwardly manage to hold things together.  

I am hopeful, despite my circumstances, because I choose to be happy.

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Life Changes - Tracey

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Life Changes - Tracey

I did things kind of late in life but it seemed like the timeline was only in my head.

When I moved to Washington, D.C. to start grad school at 27, I looked at my cohort of 23 and 24 year olds and thought “ya’ll some babies!!” I had a whole career before going back for another degree but being on the cusp of 30 was making me feel like I had more life experience, more maturity and more to lose when it came to doing well in my program. Failure wasn't an option.

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Life Changes - Tamara

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Life Changes - Tamara

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven”

— Ecclesiastes 3:1

You can log on to Twitter on any given Friday night and see a multitude of tweets about being “washed” on a Friday night. One day a couple of months back, I saw a tweet by a 40+ year old man admonishing his peers to stop being “boring” and “washed”. His logic was that we’re at the age where we can afford to travel, enjoy a night at the lounge and participate in other new experiences. He took issue with his peers being content with “just chillin’ in the house.” For what it’s worth, this guy is unmarried and childless. While I slightly agree with him, I’d like to offer a more balanced perspective.

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Life Changes - William

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Life Changes - William

So, Tram asked us to decide on a topic that described what we felt was society’s expectations of us, as we got to our Big Ages! However, not being one to allow society to dictate aspects of my life, I decided to write something a little bit… different. I don't quite recall my thought process 11 years ago when I first wrote for this series. But what I do know is that I did have expectations of what my life may look like, over a decade from then! As I maneuvered through life over those many, many years, a lot has changed. I've done things, seen things, and been through things that I definitely did not expect! I've discovered parts of me, and parts of my personality, that I didn't even know were there!

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Life Changes - Davina

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Life Changes - Davina

I wish someone would have told me that adulting is complete BS. I would love to go back to high school days, or even my college years, where I had no responsibilities, was broke as hell, but yet still managed to travel, enjoy fine dining, and just have more free time to enjoy life. I am currently in my early 30s, SINGLE AF and FNF, and just getting started in my field of study, and when I say I have no life. I LITERALLY have no life. When I’m not at work, I’m at home, mainly sleeping or catching up on my “programs” like the old lady I am, and when I’m not home I’m working my ass off only to be living paycheck to paycheck…

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Life Changes - Nicole C.

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Life Changes - Nicole C.

LIFE CHANGES,

As Do Titles and Roles

As a single, motherless woman in the prime of life, with 19 nieces & nephews, and 8 grand-nieces & nephews – there’s a role that I have grown into amongst my Calvo Clan – that of “Auntie Nicci, The Cool Aunt”.

Trust me when I tell you that I never took myself for the one person that all my siblings’ children gravitate toward. To be frank, I’m not particularly nurturing or motherly or sweet, but for whatever reason these younger generations ask frequently to sleepover or hangout or have a bbq or have poker nights at my house at least twice a month.

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Happy

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Happy

Someone asked me the other day if I were happy. In context I understand why. In a social media world of happiness theater, competition on happiness and not real happiness, but who could display it best online. I believe they genuinely wanted to know. especially seeing the changes in my life in real time over the past two years.

“Saying you are happy isn’t the same as being happy”

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Still Have the Weekend

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Still Have the Weekend

This weekend there were three fantastic moments where time seemingly stood still, allowing me to store them into a mental rolodex.

Listen to your heART

The Harvey B. Gant Center opened four new exhibitions over the weekend. I know, but I am unable to communicate why art fills us with emotion, I’ve tried to explain but apparently I’ve said it badly.  

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Random Observation #2917

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Random Observation #2917

Thug Cry

♬ Came from the hood, ain’t nothing changed/ Still lemon pepper on my motherf*ckin’ wings

Last Monday night was stressful for about twenty-five minutes.

& by stressful I mean annoying.

Lettuce' start with calling Mrs. TramueL before leaving work. I'm leaving later than normal (which is already later than most) I also have to catch a later bus.

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Style and Substance

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Style and Substance

2015 Year End Reflection

Improve relationships, healthy living, write more, read more (less television), increase income, increase savings, find ways to stay in love, practice humility (intellectually, socially and emotionally), get organized (in general, but also finances, insurance & other important records), smile & laugh more, grow spiritually and meditate.

My “better thinking” goals are just aspects, some of the parts that make up the whole of 2015. Growth and life’s lessons are (were) a consistent theme.

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Home Away From Our Home

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Home Away From Our Home

This past weekend I traveled from Charlotte to Roanoke, the city that raised me. My sister, her husband, their girls and Cooper drove from Georgia, scooped me up and we made the journey up through the mountains to my Aunt Jean's 75th (surprise) birthday party. It is truly an honor to God as she is (and has been) the matriarch of the family since my grandmother's passing. To put that into perspective, I was five.

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The worst thing to be without …

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I think about a recent conversation with my mom where we talked about politics and movies. I think about conversations with my cousin who will shoot first and ask questions later but is driven to the point of no return. I think about conversations with my sisters, their stories encompass sacrifices and triumphs in nurturing their own families. We are all absolutely unique and yet the same.

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